A Bachelor’s Best Friend - II

Let us now direct our attention to the carbs and proteins of the TV world that keep the bachelor in the pink of health. For the English speaking population, there is the eternal source of entertainment aka Star World & Zee Cafe. There are two major benefits of channels such as these:

• You stay in touch with ‘the dude’ in yourself, in spite of crumbling circumstances all around
• You can catch up with the sitcoms that entertained the Western world, a decade later! As they say, better late than never...

Whether it is the evergreen F.R.I.E.N.D.S or the ever-‘blue’ Two and a Half Men, there is something in it for the average male/female. Whether it is the 10-season repeat or re-repeat of F.R.I.E.N.D.S, the singletons make it a point to religiously watch the entire show. It is another thing that secretly they connect with one or more of the characters and wish their lives would have some semblance to the events on the show. Of course, when it comes to Two and a Half Men, the guys stand to benefit from the show, more than the gals. Every guy thinks that he has it in him to live his life like the character Charlie Harper. What reaffirms his faith on himself is that Charlie, in his real life, does live life on that ‘blue’ edge. However, much like the fox and the sour grapes story, the bachelor ends up blaming his ‘definitely-not-happening’ life by stating that Indian girls are more traditional than modern, in their thinking and otherwise!

Then comes the dose of How I Met Your Mother. Definitely innovative in its concept packaging, it makes every guy want to create a similar story of his own life, of how he meets the to-be-mother of their to-be-children. What serves as the major dampener is that most of these unattached folks have insufficient characters in their real life to make the story, especially the female ones! Then there is the LEGENDARY Barney Stinson – the very embodiment of ‘AWESOME’-ness, who does manage to convince every single guy that one can flick between chicks the way his character manages to. And then, like in a cruel movie twist, they get to know that in real life the Barney Stinson actor is happily gay, and the beautiful glass castle that they had envisioned comes crashing down!

Then there is The Big Bang Theory, which with a partial angle of science in it, clearly marks out its audience. As you may have already guessed, it definitely does not include people who fanatically keep at least a distance of 10 feet from science. From the remaining population, one third of the viewers watch the show because they are nerds, the next third watch because they love to make fun of the nerds and the final third watch simply for the girls that flock the nerds! In fact, this last group firmly believes that the ‘Langoor ke haath mein Angoor’ theory of matchmaking gets proven beyond doubt in shows such as these.

Then comes a page out of every Bachelor’s secret fantasy – the show, The Bachelor/The Bachelorette. Though way more infinitely distinguished from its ripped-off (read as inspired) Indian version of ****** ka Swayamvar (She-who-must-not-be-named), it does provide a window to the unhitched people to paint any picture they wish. Although at a philosophical level one could debate the rationale behind the decisions made, one cannot take away the fact that they do contribute substantially to the intellectual fodder of a guy/girl, at least as far as the dating ritual goes.

Of course, Star World’s desi representative does try to keep pace with the exacting standards of the videshi content through Koffee with Karan. It must be noted that even his movies put together have not kept Karan Johar in the Page 3 news as much as the chat show has managed. Just to clarify, Karan is originally a movie Director and contrary to what you would like to believe – definitely NOT Deepika’s uncle! Whether it is the Deepika-Sonam bitching or the Ranbir bashing or the Kareena-Priyanka tic-tac-toe, every Sunday evening telecast has managed to keep the Bombay times and headlines of Mumbai Mirror in print, for weeks thereafter. Not to mention that gals these days have another great gift to give to their exes – a pack of condoms!

Since we are on the topic let me add that it is better to be safe than sorry. A rubber in time lets you shine. So for now let me say “Do Svidaniya!” Till we meet again... Play safe!